How to Set Up a Monetary Wedding Registry
For engaged couples that have been living together, a monetary wedding registry makes so much sense.
That is, they likely already have what they need to furnish their home–the traditional purpose of a gift registry.
Therefore, it would be logical to set up a wedding registry to receive cash gifts.
However, as someone who wrote about a dozen books on weddings, gifts and etiquette, I realize that it might be hard for some guests to stomach the idea of giving cash.
For example, if you’re getting married in a place where guests show up at the wedding with a physical gift, this monetary registry request may be a hard sell.
On the other hand, for people who grew up in places where cash money is the expected gift–I’m looking at you, the greater New York City area where I was raised–then it’s probably not a big leap.
How to set up a monetary wedding registry
In this article about setting up a wedding registry for cash, I’m going to help you with lots of logistics.
This includes:
- How to word that you’re setting up a monetary wedding registry
- What kinds of fees are associated with a money withdrawal from your registry
- How to ask for honeymoon funds on your registry
- Companies that offer money gift registries
- If you can use Amazon or Paypal to set up a cash registry
Yes, there are legit companies out there that can help you get funds for wedding gifts versus physical things.
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Even so, there will always be guests who are not comfortable donating money to an online fund.
Perhaps in a few generations that will no longer be the case.
Nonetheless, even in a perfect scenario, not everyone is going to respect your wishes and use your monetary gift registry.
So just keep that in mind as you prepare for your big day.
Also, when it comes to things like your engagement party or even a bridal shower, people are less likely to give cash.
These are times when people tend to give physical gifts, such as kitchen items for a bridal shower.
I’m not saying don’t have a bridal shower if you don’t want “stuff.”
What I’m saying is be prepared for people to bring wrapped gifts to a bridal shower or a couple’s shower.
If you are the person planning the party, here are some great bridal shower themes, including a casino-themed shower.
Therefore, if you want to have a modicum of control over what people buy for you, consider setting up a traditional wedding registry.
How do you politely ask for money instead of gifts?
Recently, I received a wedding invitation that included the URL of the couple’s wedding website.
When I visited it, the URL redirected to their online registry.
However, it wasn’t your traditional gift registry.
Instead, it was the kind of cash registry that I’ve been talking about in this article.
In fact, there were just two items on the registry.
One, a place to contribute to their honeymoon fund.
And, two, a link to buy Delta Airlines gift cards.
Finally, there was this message to guests like me:
“We already have so much. Instead of giving us material things, please consider contributing to our first adventure as husband and wife.”
I thought this wording was the perfect approach for politely asking for money without seeming greedy.
Also, with so few choices on their registry, it takes away decision fatigue when buying gifts.
I can contribute to their honeymoon (I have no idea where they’re planning to go) or I can buy an airline gift card.
This makes buying a gift for their wedding so much easier.
Plus, it takes away the stress of worrying that I somehow forgot to get them a gift at the last minute or left my checkbook at home–yes, people still write checks for wedding gifts.
Gift card registry on Amazon
At first glance, it appears that Amazon lets you set up a gift card registry that you can use to pay for a honeymoon or something else.
However, upon closer inspection what Amazon calls a “honeymoon fund” is actually to buy items you’ll take with you on your honeymoon, such as luggage.
It does not help pay for your honeymoon.
Similarly, the Amazon “home improvement” registry is for supplies to do a home renovation project, not pay for it.
Does that make sense?
So, make sure you read the fine print before signing up for a registry that has the word “fund” in it.
Because unless this is explicitly a registry you can cash out for, well, cash, then it is just a gift card registry or a regular wedding registry parading as a monetary one.
On the other hand, if you do sign up for an Amazon wedding registry, which, by the way, is a universal gift registry, then you will be eligible for post-wedding discounts and freebies.
Companies that offer money gift registries
So, what are the companies that you can use to set up a money wedding registry? There are just a few out.
Some specialize in honeymoon funds, such as Honeyfund.
However, it’s important to keep in mind that with many of these sites, there are often fees involved.
The Knot cash wedding registry
For example, The Knot has a cash wedding registry.
When a guest makes a “donation” to your cash registry, The Knot emails you.
Then, you’ll have to wait up to three weeks for the cash to clear and get deposited in your bank account.
The Knot charges a 2.9% transaction fee. However, it’s not clear who is subject to those fees–the guest when they make a deposit or when you cash out, or both.
I’ll double check on that and get back to you.
Honeyfund honeymoon monetary registry
Honeyfund also charges a fee, if you want the money deposited directly into your bank account.
On the other hand, if you’re willing to “convert” the cash to digital gift cards, you can redeem that via PayPal or Venmo without paying a fee.
At least that’s true as of this writing.
The Honeyfund gift card terms seem to indicate that these fee-free transactions could go away at some point in the future.
MyRegistry cash registry
MyRegistry lets you set up a cash registry to celebrate your wedding.
You can arrange to receive donations towards your honeymoon or even good causes that you support.
How does this work?
Through the power of PayPal.
However, there are fees that both guests and the couple will pay when sending money via PayPal to your cash wedding registry.
That’s something to keep in mind.
Other monetary wedding registry companies
There are two other companies with cash gift registries that appear to be fee free.
One is Zola.com.
The other is Withjoy.com
Another option is to use a company that lets you finance your dream vacation, such as your honeymoon.
Final thoughts on a monetary wedding registry
Did I miss any of the finer points about setting up a cash wedding registry or honeymoon fund?
If so, post a comment and let me know.
Finally, here is a link if you’re interested in the wedding and other books I’ve written.
Cash gifts are okay with me for wedding gifts. I prefer to give VISA or American Express cash gift cards.
Last month I received an invitation to a bridal shower for our niece, along with a link to her bridal registry. I’m no Emily Post, but I was annoyed and a bit put off to see only two extraordinarily expensive gifts on the registry and a note from my niece, ‘Thanks for clicking the link, we really just want cash for our honeymoon,’ (big smile emoji)
That information could have easily been printed on the invitation Was the registry link to her “plea for cash” supposed to be cute or funny…she is 28 years old. I found it neither cute nor funny. I immediately decided I was not going to make the 6-hour round trip to the shower and emailed my regrets.
I’ve yet to decide on a shower gift for her. I’m considering other types of gift cards (restaurant, gas, bookstores, or specialty stores) she and her fiance would enjoy.
Does it matter if she is only one of our 17 first nieces, or that we haven’t seen her in years?